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When you're genuinely interested in someone, it can be a terrible feeling to realize they're just stringing you along.
And yet this White female for latin male the fairly common phenomenon of breadcrumbing: where a potential partner communicates just often enough to keep you in their back pocket but has text intention of ever meeting up. If you've been talking to them for a while, and are starting to get how impression that's what's going on, you'll have to figure out how to respond to someone who's uow you — because no one deserves to be treated that booty.
Breadcrumbing can be massively confusing because you're getting tons boty mixed als: one minute they're blowing up your phone and the next minute they're blowing off your tsxt to hang out. Figuring out how to deal with breadcrumbing is easier said than done, and can honestly be a little uncomfortable, especially guy you're not used to being direct about your emotions.
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But there are ways to spare yourself the drama. Next time you notice someone feeding you breadcrumbs to string you along whether that's via text, on social media, or even IRLhere are seven ways you can respond and nip that in the bud.
If you normally cave and respond to their 1 a. The goal, of course, is finding out where their head's at. Find their roadblock and push against it.
If they aren't breadcrumbing you, they'll be happy to respond and gu a normal, daytime conversation. But if they aren't, don't be surprised if you get another "u up" text days later.
As Milrad says, "When you see what they are willing to do, you can then decide if you want to continue under those terms. A classic breadcrumber move is keeping things confined to text and casually avoiding IRL plans. And that's because, if they're only interested in getting an ego boost from texting you, why bother hanging out?
If you're actually into them, though, and want to test the waters, try making a date and see how they respond. My day's going great. I actually have some free time this Saturday and Sunday — would you like to grab a coffee? Someone telling you they need a Horny married woman online can easily be code for "I'm not interested, but I want to delay actually saying so.
If they continue to not be available or break their plans with you A lot of people might shy away from this option because it feels too "harsh," but the truth is, being direct and upfront about what you want romantically is a of confidence and maturity.
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And if someone can't handle that, then they probably aren't someone you could get serious with, anyway. You can also be direct, and simply ask what it is they're looking for.
People are often disarmed by someone being direct, Milrad says, "but it can lead to a very straightforward and honest conversation where you can get answers. Just because someone is breadcrumbing you doesn't necessarily mean you have to cut them out of your boity. Because, while it can be a frustrating experience if you're looking for something serious, Milrad says, it might also be exactly what you're looking for.
Just make sure you're being honest with yourself about what you're looking for. You just have to set the right expectations so that you remain realistic and not get upset that this relationship is not progressing.
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And if a quick hookup isn't what you're looking for, respond accordingly. Instead of playing into their not-so-subtle attempt to woo their way into your pants, simply brush off any compliments with a joke. Or, if you're interested in meeting up instead of flirting or sexting back and forth, try asking them to hang out and see how they respond. This is a simple way to test someone's commitment level.
Ultimately, if a breadcrumber's constant hot-and-cold attitude starts to negatively impact your emotions, then it might be best to just call things off. By letting it go, you'll not only experience a sense of relief; you'll also open yourself up to creating a relationship that better fits what you're looking for.
This article was originally published on July 14, yuy By Laken Howard. Would you like to grab a coffee? I'll wait for you to reschedule.